The holidays are often filled with joy, but they can also bring many feelings of stress and overwhelm. Between family gatherings, gift-giving, and packed schedules, it’s easy to feel drained. For those navigating anxiety or the effects of trauma, the season's demands can be especially challenging.
But the holidays don’t have to be overwhelming. By setting clear boundaries, staying grounded, and tuning into your body’s needs, you can move through December with more ease. Let’s explore simple ways to stay calm, present, and connected to yourself during this busy time.
1. The Hidden Toll of Holiday Stress: Why It Feels So Intense
Holiday stress isn’t just about buying gifts or planning meals: it’s also about navigating emotional waves that the season can bring about. Family gatherings can stir old memories or unresolved dynamics, and the societal expectation to feel “merry and bright” can leave those experiencing anxiety or trauma feeling isolated.
Physically, holiday stress can manifest as tightness in the chest, a racing heart, or even a sense of numbness. These are signs that your nervous system is on high alert, often without your conscious awareness.
Somatic Awareness Practice:Take a few moments to pause and scan your body. Where do you feel tightness or tension? Name it gently, like, “There’s tension in my shoulders” or “I feel heaviness in my chest.” Let yourself simply notice, without needing to change anything. This simple act of acknowledgment can begin to loosen the grip of stress.
2. Redefining Boundaries: Moving from Obligation to Intention
Many of us have been conditioned to equate holiday participation with love and belonging. But true connection doesn’t come from sacrificing your well-being to meet the expectations of others. It comes from showing up authentically: something that’s only possible when you set clear boundaries.
Reframe Boundaries as Acts of Love:
For Yourself: When you say no to something that drains you, you’re saying yes to your own peace.
For Others: Clear boundaries allow you to show up more fully when you do engage, offering presence rather than resentment.
Boundary Affirmation:“I am allowed to protect my energy. Saying no is an act of kindness—to myself and to others.”
3. Breathwork as a Refuge: Reclaim Calm in Moments of Chaos
Breath is the most accessible tool we have for calming the nervous system. When anxiety takes hold, it’s often accompanied by shallow, rapid breathing, which signals to the body that you’re in danger. By consciously slowing and deepening your breath, you send a powerful message to your nervous system: I am safe.
Breathwork Practice for Immediate Calm:
Find a comfortable seated position and close your eyes if you feel safe to do so.
Inhale deeply through your nose for a count of 4, feeling your belly expand.
Hold the breath for a count of 4.
Exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 6, letting your shoulders drop.
Repeat for 5 rounds, noticing any shifts in your body or mind.
This practice not only calms the body but also anchors you in the present moment, helping to dissolve the overwhelm that comes from future-focused worries.
4. Finding Moments of Stillness: Creating Calm in the Chaos
The holidays often come with a fast pace, leaving little room to breathe. Instead of focusing on traditions that feel obligatory, focus on cultivating small moments of stillness to help you reset. These moments don’t need to be elaborate: they’re about finding peace in simplicity.
Ideas for Moments of Stillness:
Morning Pause: Start each day with a quiet moment, sipping your favorite warm drink without distractions. Let the stillness anchor you before the day’s activities begin.
Breath Breaks: Take 3–5 deep, slow breaths at various points throughout the day, using breath as a reminder to slow down.
Evening Wind-Down: Before bed, take a few minutes to stretch or lie down with a hand on your heart, focusing on the sensation of your breath and letting go of the day’s stress.
These micro-moments of stillness can help you stay connected to yourself amidst the holiday hustle, offering moments of meaningful of calm when life feels chaotic.
5. Embracing Imperfection: Letting Go of the Holiday Ideal
One of the biggest sources of holiday stress is the belief that everything must be perfect: the perfect meal, the perfect gift, the perfect family gathering. But striving for perfection often leads to exhaustion and disappointment.
Instead, practice self-compassion. Allow space for things to be messy, incomplete, or different from what you imagined.
Somatic Self-Compassion Exercise:Place your hand over your heart and take a deep breath. As you exhale, whisper to yourself: “It’s okay to not have it all together. I am enough, just as I am.” Notice how it feels to give yourself this permission.
6. The Gift of Self-Care: Make Yourself a Priority
Amongst the busyness of the season, it’s easy to put your own needs last. But self-care isn’t selfish: it’s essential. Prioritize rest, nourishment, and activities that replenish your mind, body and soul.
Simple Self-Care Ideas for December:
Take 5 minutes each day for a grounding practice, like stretching or deep breathing.
Carve out time for a favorite hobby, whether it’s reading, crafting, or baking.
Allow yourself to step away from conversations or situations that feel draining.
Conclusion: Choose Connection with Yourself First!
This holiday season, remember that you have the power to rewrite the narrative. You don’t have to say yes to everything, meet every expectation, or carry the emotional weight of others. Instead, choose to prioritize your well-being, honor your boundaries, and stay rooted in the present moment.
When you nurture yourself, you create space for the holidays to be what they were always meant to be: a time of connection, joy, and peace – starting with the connection you have with yourself.
By; Janessa Meissner
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